Otherwise known as Day III of WRITINGWRITINGREVISING
So, the best way to put it was that I wanted to leave the room the entire time. Seeing it performed and perceived that way makes my shoulders cringe even thinking about it.
In my head, even now, it sounds right and I can see it happening in my head, but I've found it's hard to convey that in the text. Hopefully that'll get better with practice.
I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing that it looks so right in my head. Is it wrong, should I have lower expectations, especially in a cold read? Or is it right, and I'm just overthinking it? 'Is it me or is it them?' was one of the main things on my mind, sitting there.
I also feel like I'm not revising ENOUGH. Overthinking again, I think, but I could be wrong. Or I could be right. Or I could be wrong. So what?
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Day Two of writingwritingwriting
Today I think was definitely easier than yesterday, just because it seems easier to incorporate things I've already written into the overall finished product.
Writing the apology seemed easier than it actually was, though. We don't exactly 'apologize' in my house. When you try to apologize, the other person tends to stay a little angry no matter what. You can forgive mostly, but you can never forget. And we can't forget how angry what the other person did made us. Every time we fight it just builds up and reeks of subtext, so I had to make things more open without being corny. We all hold things against each other, so I had to find a way that seemed like it could happen while still trying to abide by the 'rules'.
There's not a lot I want to say about this whole project that I didn't cover yesterday, to be honest. Sitting next to Emily while working and having her look over and make comment snippets really helped me keep going. I thought I would like writing the indirect apology more, but I ended up dragging through it and that was ridiculously annoying.
This is such a boring blog post. But today was just very monotone for me. It was easy enough to get done and in the end I just want to get over it and not have to read it again because every time I do my eyes tear up and I get pissed. Maybe that's why I don't want to talk about it. But I'm not certain.
Writing the apology seemed easier than it actually was, though. We don't exactly 'apologize' in my house. When you try to apologize, the other person tends to stay a little angry no matter what. You can forgive mostly, but you can never forget. And we can't forget how angry what the other person did made us. Every time we fight it just builds up and reeks of subtext, so I had to make things more open without being corny. We all hold things against each other, so I had to find a way that seemed like it could happen while still trying to abide by the 'rules'.
There's not a lot I want to say about this whole project that I didn't cover yesterday, to be honest. Sitting next to Emily while working and having her look over and make comment snippets really helped me keep going. I thought I would like writing the indirect apology more, but I ended up dragging through it and that was ridiculously annoying.
This is such a boring blog post. But today was just very monotone for me. It was easy enough to get done and in the end I just want to get over it and not have to read it again because every time I do my eyes tear up and I get pissed. Maybe that's why I don't want to talk about it. But I'm not certain.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Day One of writingwritingwriting
Blog Post Time!
So I had do deal with a lot of frustration today, which is a first, let me tell you. It was definitely frustrating because my writing tends to be 'angry/angsty' in nature, but in a sarcastic and not outright Fighting tone. So having to write a fight, and one that has ACTUALLY happened, multiple times because I never learn, was really.... I hate talking about fighting with my family, and the fight I wrote about ended up being very superficial almost because I am constantly fighting with my family over the same things. I don't want to talk about some of the things we fight about that maybe would have been for 'entertaining', but I'd be too embarrassed or scared to turn in.
I wanted to start banging my head against something whenever I'd feel as though I'd been getting even slightly offtrack. And I felt like I wasn't going fast enough. I would look at the clock on my laptop and cringe a little. Pounding things out when I felt like I wasn't saying things right was something that I found that I really need to work to get over. When I'm writing, I always want to say the exact right thing (and Luke, that's EXACTLY why I STILL haven't sent you my original script back yet! It's so hard to put my exact feelings to words that I am almost disappointed that I haven't been able to!) So I'll be working on that this week.
I hated but understood the one page script (we had to sum it up and that's important to be able to do in writing, but I love my descriptive nature no matter how boring it can be sometimes, it's part of my voice), found the three page to be probably the easiest, and the six page to be gruelingly long and pulled out in the end. Overall, it felt nice to turn my brain off at times, but thinking ended up biting me in the bum because trying to write in the voice of other people sometimes makes me stop and go 'Would they REALLY say that?' and gets nothing done.
So I had do deal with a lot of frustration today, which is a first, let me tell you. It was definitely frustrating because my writing tends to be 'angry/angsty' in nature, but in a sarcastic and not outright Fighting tone. So having to write a fight, and one that has ACTUALLY happened, multiple times because I never learn, was really.... I hate talking about fighting with my family, and the fight I wrote about ended up being very superficial almost because I am constantly fighting with my family over the same things. I don't want to talk about some of the things we fight about that maybe would have been for 'entertaining', but I'd be too embarrassed or scared to turn in.
I wanted to start banging my head against something whenever I'd feel as though I'd been getting even slightly offtrack. And I felt like I wasn't going fast enough. I would look at the clock on my laptop and cringe a little. Pounding things out when I felt like I wasn't saying things right was something that I found that I really need to work to get over. When I'm writing, I always want to say the exact right thing (and Luke, that's EXACTLY why I STILL haven't sent you my original script back yet! It's so hard to put my exact feelings to words that I am almost disappointed that I haven't been able to!) So I'll be working on that this week.
I hated but understood the one page script (we had to sum it up and that's important to be able to do in writing, but I love my descriptive nature no matter how boring it can be sometimes, it's part of my voice), found the three page to be probably the easiest, and the six page to be gruelingly long and pulled out in the end. Overall, it felt nice to turn my brain off at times, but thinking ended up biting me in the bum because trying to write in the voice of other people sometimes makes me stop and go 'Would they REALLY say that?' and gets nothing done.
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