And I hate that I need constant reassurance, but I do. And I know that it won't always be there, but I can't help freak out when I think something of mine isn't 'good enough' whatever that means.
I guess it could be considered perfectionism, but it isn't, I swear. Mostly because I don't believe what we have been taught to perceive as perfection exists, but oh well. I can't really proactively do anything about it. Or maybe I can.
Ah! Another issue that has come up recently! I suddenly have this extreme maternal instinct to make sure everyone is okay and happy and all of that fluff. I'm not used to this. I'm so used to self-preservation that putting everyone in front of my own needs feels right but wierd but right. I think it started in December. Has enough time passed to go to a self-help class for it? Maybe it'll come in handy on a STAC trip or something equally as helpful with protectiveness.
Also, listen to Royal Teeth's Act Naturally - EP. Shh, just go with it.
I really fracking like it, if I do say so myself.
Or you could listen to Black Treacle by the Arctic Monkeys.
Which is lovely as well.
Let's dance together. Even though I cannot dance for the life of me.
And now.... off to write an intention statement!
1 comment:
I know how you feel, the constant feeling of having to take care of everyone else over yourself. It's not fun. But you have to realize that it's impossible, and you need to relax. If someones not happy, it's not your fault Jessica.
This is perfectionism, though I know you don't think it is. Not just wanting yourself to be perfect, but everyone else around you. But it's tiring and scary. and after a while it drives you insane.
Perfection does not exist, the only thing we can do, is be the best we can be.
Post a Comment